To walk on earth

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 A beautiful reflection from St. Teresa Benedicta (Edith Stein), that I think is very fitting for Lent.. .

"Only those who are saved, only children of grace can in fact be bearer's of Christ's cross. Only in union with the divine Head does suffering take on expiatory power. To suffer and to be happy although suffering, to have one's feet on the earth, to walk along the dirty and rough paths of this earth and yet be enthroned with Christ at the Father's right hand, to laugh and cry with the children of this world and ceaselessly to sing the praises of God with the choirs of angels, this is the life of the Christian until the morning of eternity breaks forth."  ~ Edith Stein, HL 91-93

What holds you back?

In the Lenten season, it is easy to focus on external practices. Most especially, to let our Lenten devotion be predominated by the penances we choose. No chocolate. No TV. No meat. etc. Fasting and strengthening our self-discipline are extremely important things for us to cultivate, this is true. But it is so easy to stop here, at the more material penances, than to use the season of self-denial to really probe into further introspection.

Something God has brought to the forefront of my heart this Lent, is to look at the things inside my heart that hold me back from Him. Is it chocolate? Is it the radio? Is it meat? I can definitely over indulge in these things, and there is plenty of room in my life for more discipline. But there are far, far deeper things that are holding me back from truly allowing myself to feel the love of God.

For starters...

discouragement
lack of trust
not truly believing I am worthy of the love of God
not enough thirst for holiness
self-centeredness

I think God is calling me to begin to let go of THESE things in my life.

How do you even begin to give up "lack of faith in God"? I'm just going to guess that this is not something that can be completely rooted out in 40 days. But, if I allow God to take a shovel to the soil of my heart, and begin to loosen the soil around these weaknesses...this is progress. After all, it's only by getting rid of these dark weeds that suffocate a chance for complete surrender to God, that there will be room for His love to truly take root and reside.

Time to write again

Any artist or creative person knows that art output can be seasonal. We have seasons of prolific production; more often we have seasons of stark dryness, amidst our best intentions. Sometimes we should push ourselves to write, create, and produce through the dryness. Other times, there is an inner voice that tells us to "be still." Likewise, sometimes there are so many intense, confusing, and energy-consuming events going on in our lives, that we desire to ponder, sift, and sort it all out internally. That's ok. When the springtime of creativity comes upon us again, we will know it, and we will have a new found desire to write, to paint, to sculpt, to sing - to sing our songs aloud again - the tunes and stories being all the richer after a deep season of creative winter.

All this to say, I think it's spring again for me. Something inside me is moving me to write again. I can't promise perpetual profundity, but at least I'll be writing. Thanks for coming along for the journey - hopefully I can devote at least a little time each week to writing here!